The Long Road Home
by Shakespeare's Lemonade
Summary: SEQUEL to Dying to Live. After the McGarretts are forced to leave Hawaii, they fight to stay one step ahead of Wo Fat. Meanwhile, 5-0, under Danny's command, tries to make home safe again for their family. Steve/OC, Danny/Kono, Chin/Malia.
1. Prologue: This is Just Temporary

"The Long Road Home"

Shakespeare's Lemonade

Rating: T

Genre: Family/Friendship/Drama

Summary: After the McGarretts are forced to leave Hawaii, they fight to stay one step ahead of Wo Fat. Meanwhile, 5-0, under Danny's command, tries to make home safe again for their family.

Pairings: Steve/OC, Danny/Kono, Chin/Malia

A/N: This is the sequel to "Dying to Live" and is the final installment in that series. It makes a lot more sense if you read the entire series first.

_Prologue: This Is Just Temporary_

"_This is just temporary. Dust once we were; to dust we will return."~Bannerhill_

Detective David Beckett had mixed feelings as he waited in the airport. He was happy to be seeing the McGarretts, but equally unhappy at their reason for coming. He understood though, as few people could. He knew the compulsion to protect one's family, even though he had no more to protect. But that was all about to change. Steve, McKenzie, and their new little girl would be his family. He could help protect them as long as they were in his city.

It wasn't long before Beckett saw his temporary family coming toward the baggage claim.

"Welcome to the windy city," he said and was met with tired smiles.

"Thank you," Steve said, shaking Beckett's hand.

"Well, I've got the guest room made up and dinner in the oven, so let's get you three home."

"You didn't have to do all that."

"Of course I did. I'm sure Hawaiians are much more friendly, but I thought I'd give Chicago some good PR. And anyway, I want to."

"We really appreciate it," McKenzie said, adjusting Lucy's position.

"It's the least I can do for all the help solving my case. You have your bags?"

"Yeah," Steve said. "There was some concern about the weather, though."

Beckett smiled as he gave their attire a once over. McKenzie was wearing a black sweatshirt that looked too big for her and Steve wore a jacket along with his usual t-shirt and cargo pants. The latter might be a little light, but Beckett doubted Steve would complain.

"I think you'll live for now," he said. "There's only a little slush. At this point, I'm more concerned about work clothes." He gave Steve an ironic look.

"I had a feeling you would say that," Steve said.

They made it to Beckett's car and then his house without incident. He offered to watch Lucy so they could settle in and shower after their 12 hour flight. Upon entering the house and smelling the food cooking, Steve and McKenzie thought that was a very good idea. So, they went upstairs while Beckett took care of Lucy. She was still sleeping, but soon after her parents left the room, she opened her eyes. At first, she seemed somewhat confused, and unsure of this strange man holding her. But after a few moments of analyzing his face, she appeared to relax and settled for sporadic squirming.

"It's nice to meet you," Beckett said. "You can call me Grandpa Davy... if you want."

Lucy blinked and yawned.

"I suppose you're hungry, aren't you?" Beckett found her bottle and started a pan of water to warm it up. He couldn't remember whether the microwave was safe for that or not.

Once he started feeding her, Lucy seemed to warm up to him. She was content to lie in his arms and enjoy her dinner. It wasn't long before Steve came back down the stairs to find his daughter sleeping again.

"You that boring, Beckett?" he asked.

"Not at all." The other man laughed. "She woke up just after you left. She was very excited about dinner."

Steve grinned. "She takes after her mother."

"Aha. But she looks like you."

"Nobody's perfect."

"She's s lucky girl."

"How do you mean?"

"To have parents who love her so much. Sometimes no matter what we do, we can't keep them safe, but... we do what we can."

"You know, I'm not sure where we'd be without you. You've made this a lot easier."

"I'm glad. Of course, I'm sorry that you had to do this, but glad I could help."

"It's just... McKenzie. She's been through so much in the last year. I was afraid of what this move would do to her."

"She's stronger than she lets on."

"That's true. How did you know?"

"Well, her reputation precedes her. But actually, she reminds me of my Alice."

Steve only nodded. He didn't know much about Beckett's daughter, but if she was anything like McKenzie, he could only imagine the pain of losing her.

"She and her mother were best friends," Beckett continued. "And worst enemies. But if those two were together against me on anything, there was no way I'd win. When we lost Amanda, I saw Alice's heart break. I thought she'd never get over it, but she surprised me. She actually started taking care of me. McKenzie has the same spirit."

Steve nodded again. "She's a survivor. She never ceases to amaze me."

"That's good." Beckett smiled. "Just keep that attitude."

Upstairs, they heard the shower stop running and Beckett thought it was about time to get dinner on the table. He handed Lucy to Steve and headed for the kitchen.

"I'll take you by the precinct in the morning," he said as Steve followed him. "After that, I have a realtor friend who might have found a place for you."

With his back turned, Beckett couldn't see the grateful look in Steve's eyes. "How can we thank you?" he asked.

Beckett turned away from the stove. "Well, for one thing, Sunday dinner is at one. I'll be expecting you. And you can call me Davy. At least when we aren't working."

Beckett watched the look in Steve's eyes intensify and he knew he was doing the right thing. It had been a long time since he'd had any family, but it was something he knew he was made for. He knew Steve and McKenzie needed the help and he was glad they were accepting it gracefully.

"Oh," Beckett added. "I told Lucy she could call me Grandpa Davy. I hope you don't mind."

**H-5-O**

Danny rested his head on his desk as if that would lessen his headache. It wasn't even his desk; it was Steve's. For now, it was his.

Propping himself up on his elbows, Danny sighed. He knew he had to get over the initial shock of everything and get to work. However, the first item on his agenda, finding a new partner, was possibly the most headache inducing idea of all. But Danny already knew what he was going to do. He just had to work up the courage to do it.

He heard the door that had been Steve's open and close and he looked across the office to see Kono standing there.

"Is this how you do things in Jersey?" she asked and tried not to smile.

"No," Danny replied. "We never have to deal with stuff like this in Jersey."

"Right. So..."

"So?"

Kono came over to the desk and crossed her arms as she leaned against it. "So, what have you decided?"

"I think," Danny began, and the idea of speaking the words made his head hurt worse. "I think I'm going to undertake the impossible task of training Jenna."

Kono smiled. "I thought so," she said.

"Really?"

"Yeah. She wants to learn. She's got the energy, the intelligence, and she's already proven she can take your wrath."

"I don't have wrath."

"You do."

"Fine... You really think this is a good idea?"

Kono shrugged. "What options do you have? It's way better than having to train someone new."

"So what are we going to do when you have to take some time off?"

"I don't have to take that much time."

"I said _some_."

"We'll figure it out. Maybe we'll solve the case by then and Steve will be back."

"Thank you. We need another optimist around here."

"We'll be okay, Danny."

"I know. I don't know how, but we will. This won't last forever after all."


	2. It Hurts

**Thank you all for the reviews. I know this one's a little slow starting out, but trust me there will be blood later on... not too much, of course. Oh, and check out the song I used as the chapter title. It's amazing. I'll post it on my playlist for which you can find the link on my profile.**

**Chapter One "It Hurts"  
><strong>_**"It hurts when you need me. And I can't break your fall. It hurts when you can't see. And it hurts. **__**And it hurts when you're lonely. And I'm standing right beside you there. And it hurt when you told me that you tried this on your own."~Thousand Foot Krutch**_

Danny found Jenna at the shooting range. Over the past few weeks, he had watched her shift from her former behind-the-scenes attitude to whatever this was. She was determined to prove herself. Failing to capture Wo Fat had made her more intent on him. Danny wasn't sure how much he cared for the personal vendetta angle, but he knew Jenna would do her best. She could learn to be a cop. And something in him knew she needed to. Like him, she needed to protect her family.

Danny watched as she emptied her clip on the unfortunate paper target. Her aim was getting better too. He smiled at that thought.

"I think he's dead," Danny said, leaning against the wall behind her.

Jenna turned around, surprised. "Sorry, I didn't see you," she said, too loudly.

Danny tapped his ear and she realized she still had her hearing protection on. She took it off and looked sheepish.

"So, is there some reason you're punishing the poor target?"

Jenna shrugged. "Practice?"

Danny smiled. "Good. You're gonna need it."

"Huh?"

"Well, that is if you want the job."

"What job?"

"The one where you're my partner... in training."

"Are you serious? You're serious."

Danny could see childlike excitement in Jenna's eyes where a second ago had been murderous rage. Perhaps she was more like Steve than anyone realized.

"Yeah," Danny said. "Just a few rules, you know. I tell you to do something, you do it. Stuff like that."

"Oh, of course."

"Yeah, you say that now. Tomorrow, you'll be hanging people off roofs."

"I don't think I could hold someone up to do that."

"Okay, dropping people. Whatever. Just don't do it, okay?"

"You got it, boss."

"Why do I get a sense of impending doom?"

"I don't know. What did you have for breakfast?"

"Funny. Very funny. You'll have to work on that."

"A sense of humor is part of the job description?"

"It's essential."

"All right. I'll work on it."

**H-5-O**

Steve didn't know what he was expecting from his first week in Chicago, but it certainly wasn't what happened. Thankfully Beckett didn't make him wear a tie, but chasing suspects in his new shoes wasn't much fun. He thought he would have taken the tie if it meant he could wear his boots. After the third foot chase in two days, Steve decided he didn't care what anyone thought; he wasn't wearing those dress shoes anymore. Beckett looked the other way.

Upon returning to their desks one evening, Beckett postulated a theory.

"I am fairly certain," he said, "that Detective Williams was right; danger does follow you."

"No, it's the other way around," Steve argued. "I follow danger."

"You think you might tone it down a little?"

"You think you might stop breathing?"

Beckett smiled. "I guess I'll have to get used to it. Probably good for me anyway. You finish your reports?"

"Yeah. Let's go."

Beckett's smile widened. "You are about to taste the best pizza you've ever had," he said.

"I'm sure."

"McKenzie said she'd meet us there."

As they were headed toward the restaurant, Steve's phone rang. He didn't recognize the number, but he answered it.

"Hello Steve," came the familiar Irish voice. "How are you settling in?"

"Just fine," Steve replied. "Something up?"

"No. Just wanted to make sure the three of you were still alive."

"You just fill me with confidence."

"You're welcome. Listen wherever you are, stay put for now. Wo Fat's not on to you yet. I'll be sure to give you plenty of warning if he gets too close."

"Thanks."

"And in case you're wondering, the rest of your team was fine last I heard."

"They keep me informed."

"You'll want to be careful with that."

"We are. Thanks for the check in."

"You're welcome."

The call ended and Steve stared out the car window, wondering how his life had come to this.

"Everything all right?" Beckett asked.

"Yeah," Steve said. "Just never thought I'd be exchanging pleasantries with the man who killed my father."

**H-5-O**

Danny still had a headache. He couldn't remember the last time he didn't have a headache. He didn't really blame Jenna. She was the ultimate rookie and thus had much to learn.

"You're gonna want to work on the backup thing," he told her.

"Sorry." Jenna winced looking at Danny's bruised jaw. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm fine."

"You're sure?"

"It is not the partner's job to question the well-being of the other partner."

"Wait a second." Jenna held up her hand. "I thought there was some unwritten rule about apologizing and caring and all that."

"That's when you get someone shot."

"Shot, beaten up, whatever. Point being, your jaw isn't broken is it?"

"No."

"Okay. So, I'm sorry I didn't get to you in time."

"Apology accepted. I'm sure you'll do better next time."

"I will."

"Okay. So, now you book the suspect and we go do paperwork."

"What, I don't get a special nickname?"

"No. My way of showing affection is yelling at you. I don't do nicknames."

"You must really like me."

"Just get the suspect and let's go."

"Can I drive?"

"No!"

This was going to be a long day. Danny remembered how hard it was to break Steve in. He didn't think Jenna would be that difficult, but she was shaping up to be her own version of insane. Danny had to remind himself that he was okay with that; he liked insane.

**H-5-O**

Week two involved moving and a very cranky baby. Steve knew this was all part of the deal. It seemed to take forever, but finally, they had their new house set up and Lucy seemed to be calming down. The upheaval so far in her very short life would make anyone a little irritable. When she started sleeping normally again, Steve and McKenzie breathed a collective sigh of relief. By this time, the house was moved into and Beckett had finally felt it safe to leave them alone.

It was the middle of the night, but Steve was only half asleep. Everything that had happened in the last few weeks was filtering through his mind, trying to be made sense of. McKenzie slept on his arm, surprisingly rather fitfully. That might have been the reason Steve wasn't asleep yet. He was used to her sleeping soundly no matter where she was, even after he came home from his long absence.

Steve's hand tightened around her still too this shoulder. Her entire body was tense against his. He put his other arm around her, his hand resting on her hip. The only thing Steve could remember that seemed like this was when McKenzie used to have blackouts and nightmares. It had been a very long time since that had happened.

McKenzie's lips parted and Steve heard a low noise, like words, but not quite. His grip tightened. Her muscles contracted and she stirred in his arms. Then she spoke clearly.

"Dad," she said. "Dad... I'm sorry..."

Steve pulled her closer and whispered in her ear, "Annie. Wake up." He knew to use that name because he was the only person who called her that and only when they were alone.

Sure enough, McKenzie's eyes flew open. "Steve?" she whispered breathlessly. Then she sighed. "It was a dream."

"Are you okay?" Steve said.

She nodded. "Yeah. Just a bad dream."

"With you, that means something."

"It was nothing."

"Why don't you want to tell me?"

"Because it won't help. It won't change anything."

"What exactly? What are you sorry for?"

McKenzie was silent for a moment. She hadn't realized she had spoken out loud in her sleep. "Kyle," she finally said.

Steve understood instantly. McKenzie felt responsible for her brother's death. "It wasn't your fault, Annie," Steve said.

McKenzie shook her head. "It was. There's nothing to do about it. It was." She rolled onto her side away from him, but Steve didn't let go of her. He held onto her, hoping if anything, it would let her sleep the rest of the night.

**H-5-O**

In the morning, McKenzie refused to talk about what happened. She acted busy with Lucy and Steve was about ready to leave for work, to give up. But then it struck him what he was doing. He couldn't leave things as they were all day.

So, Steve turned away from his new front door and headed back to his new kitchen. McKenzie was pacing as she fed Lucy.

"I can't leave it like this," Steve said.

"Leave what?" McKenzie asked.

"Don't do that. You know what I'm talking about."

"I don't know what more there is to say. I mean, you always say we have to live with our choices, right?"

"Yes, but you don't have to live with his. Kyle made the choices that led to his death, not you. If you keep wondering what would have happened, you'll drive yourself crazy. Nothing else would have happened. It's done. It's over. He was your brother and you should feel that, but you know you are not responsible."

"I'm the one who made him help me."

Steve shook his head. "You didn't make him do anything. He loved you; he couldn't help himself. In the end, you were the only thing that mattered."

"Am I supposed to be happy about that?"

"Happy? I don't know that happiness is all that important. But you might feel some closure because of it... eventually."

McKenzie stared out the back window for a moment until Lucy began squirming. "You should get going," she said.

"McKenzie—"

"No. I get it, all right? It doesn't change how I feel."

Steve crossed the small room and held her by the shoulders. "Only you can do that. It's not all going to be over just like that. Just... don't close me out, okay?"

McKenzie wouldn't look him in the eye and Steve could see tears forming in her eyes.

"Hey," he said taking her chin in one hand and forcing her to look at him. "I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong." The tears began spilling over and McKenzie tried to turn away, but Steve held her face toward his. "Hey. Listen to me," Steve said. "A million things have happened in the last few weeks and we can't just bury it all."

"What? Like you?" McKenzie choked.

"No. Not like me. I don't say things the way you do, but you know how to read me. You know what questions to ask, only you're scared to."

"Then you should get to work and maybe if your daughter's not to grumpy tonight, I'll ask those questions."

Steve half smiled. "Hey, I love you." He kissed he softly and let go of her chin.

"I love you too," McKenzie whispered.


	3. Consistent Beat

**Sorry it's been so long! I hope you're all still out there, and thank you for reading and reviewing. I hope this chapter was worth the wait.**

**Chapter Two "Consistent Beat"**

"_**My mind isn't quite sure what it has bargained for, but my heart is in time with, with the consistent beat of yours."~Ivoryline**_

Steve got home late and tired. It was ironic that his new job was so mild in comparison to his previous one, and yet he found himself more tired that before. Maybe he was just worn out from everything.

When he opened his front door, the first thing Steve heard was the voice of a very ill-humored baby. He had a feeling it would be a long night.

McKenzie was pacing the kitchen with Lucy, trying to calm her down. For a second, Steve stood in the doorway and watched. Lucy was having none of it. It would have been almost funny, if Steve didn't feel so sorry for McKenzie.

She looked up when she heard him and gave him a weak smile. "Hey," McKenzie said.

"Hey," Steve replied, crossing the kitchen and kissing her head. "You want me to take that?"

"You'd better eat first," McKenzie replied, nodding toward the stove.

"Have you eaten already?"

McKenzie looked sheepish. "I was hungry."

"Hey, that's fine. I know I was late. I should have called."

"You weren't that late."

"I'll call next time."

McKenzie smiled. "I see what you're doing," she said.  
>"What?"<p>

"Making sure I don't resent you and all that."

"Is there something wrong with that?"

"No. I appreciate it."

Steve smiled back at her and leaned down to kiss her lips. "I love you," he whispered.

"I love you too," McKenzie said. "Eat." She carried Lucy off into the living room, hoping a change of scenery might distract her.

Steve ate quickly and then followed McKenzie. She looked tired and ready to give up. Steve came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"I'm here to relieve you," he said.

She turned her head to look at him. "Aren't you tired?"

"Not of this." Steve lifted Lucy out of McKenzie's arms as if she weighed no more than air. She was still crying, but had lost some of her enthusiasm.

"She gets this from you," McKenzie said as she flopped down on the couch.

Steve smirked. "And I always thought those were your lungs," he said.

McKenzie only smiled and didn't argue.

"I think it's the excitement," Steve said. "We've only been here a couple weeks and I already think we need a vacation."

"We needed a vacation months ago," McKenzie said.

Steve nodded. "Fair enough."

**H-5-O**

Danny tapped his fingers on his desk and contemplated early retirement for the hundredth time that week. It wasn't that Jenna was bad at being a cop. On the contrary, it seemed she had taken a page out of McGarrett's book: _War and Peace without the Peace_. She learned fast and was a little too eager to put her new skills into practice.

Kono came into his office looking absolutely pregnant and smiling. "Rough day?" she asked.  
>Danny sighed. "Rough life," he said. "Nothing new."<p>

"Yeah, um, about the new hires..."

"Oh, I don't even want to think about that now."

"I know. The latest round of applicants will be here in the morning."

"I have that—"

"No, you don't. You're almost finished with today's reports, and unless someone steals Waikiki Beach tomorrow, we have no imminent cases. You're interviewing."

Danny grumbled something unintelligible and stood up. "I never thought I'd say this about work, but I wish Steve were here."

"Everyone does," Kono said. "Are you done already?"

"I was done when you came in. I was just regrouping."

"With yourself?"

"Yes."

"In that case, can we go home now?"

"Definitely."

"Oh, and remember Grace has a half day tomorrow."

Danny smiled in a way that was almost evil.

"Okay." Kono put her hands on her hips. "What's with the face?"

"Face?" Danny tried to look innocent. "Nothing."

"Yeah, no. what are you thinking?"

"Oh, just that I'll only have to spend the _morning_ interviewing."

"Chin's gonna be mad."

"I suppose so, but what can I do?" Danny shrugged and pushed open his door.

As they walked down the stairs, Kono shook her head. "Danny, you know we need more people," she said. "At least one or two. I can't do everything I used to and Steve's gone. Yeah, we have Jenna, but she's not exactly experienced."

"I know," Danny said. "It's just the process. Nothing is as easy for us as it was for Steve."

"It looked easy. Everything looks easy for him. That doesn't mean it is."

**H-5-O**

Lucy was finally asleep, having worn herself out completely. It was hoped that she would stay that way for a while. After putting her to bed, Steve came back downstairs to find McKenzie still lying on the couch, eyes half shut. She was at an angle with her shoulders resting on the arm of the couch and her knees bent over the side. Steve slid in between her and the back of the couch, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his head on her chest.

"I'm sleeping," McKenzie mumbled. She could feel Steve smile as he turned his head to press his lips to her collarbone.

"I know," he whispered into her skin.

Steve felt McKenzie's fingers in his hair while her other hand rested on his arm. Then she moved her hand over his shoulder to his neck. She found the scar from Arnold Hadley's knife that still stood out after more than a year. She ran her hand down his chest, feeling the more recent wounds from Hesse and Jameson. Steve's right arm was under McKenzie so she couldn't feel the scar from his fractured arm caused by her brother. Perhaps that was a sign for something.

"What are you looking for?" Steve asked, not really meaning anything specific.

"A way to let go," McKenzie whispered. "But I can still feel all the ways people hurt you... and there's nothing I can do about it."

Steve pushed himself up so he could look her in the eye. He didn't know what to say to her because he wasn't sure how to let go either.

But he didn't have to. McKenzie brought her hand up under his chin and pulled him closer. Steve felt her eyelashes brush his cheek before her lips caught his. For a second he forgot that there was anything to be worried about.

**H-5-O**

McKenzie was surprised that she didn't fall asleep the second her head hit the pillow. But there seemed to be something left to do, though she couldn't think of what it was. Steve was still awake too, but that wasn't surprising. He never fell asleep until after she did.

McKenzie rolled onto her side facing Steve. Her forehead came to rest against his and she heard him exhale deeply.

"Why aren't you asleep?" he asked.

"I was thinking," she replied.

McKenzie could feel Steve's smirk. "You do that a lot."

"I wanted to tell you that I'm okay."

"Why's that?"

"Because I know you were getting worried. I don't know how to make everything better, but I'm okay. We're safe and together and that's all that matters."

"Are you sure?"

McKenzie reached up and traced the scar on Steve's neck and then made lines between the bullet holes on his chest. Steve wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against him.

In the dark, McKenzie found Steve's lips, enjoying their soft warmth. It contrasted with the way her fingers brushed against the ubiquitous stubble on his jaw.

Steve's hand pressed against McKenzie's back, making her chest flatten against his so that she could feel his heart beating.

Breathless, McKenzie answered the question Steve had forgotten he asked. "Yes," she said. "I'm sure."


	4. Moving On

**Sorry this has taken so long. I've been distracted by being in Mexico and Chaos and many other things. I hope you're all still reading and I really apprciate all the comments from everyone. Hopefully my updating will be more regular when I get home next week.**

**Chapter Three "Moving On"**

"_**We're moving on and we've got nothing to prove to anyone, 'cause we'll get through."~Good Charlotte**_

Sunday dinner at the Beckett house was an event. Davy did nothing by halves and he always invited coworkers without families. Not many ever came, but he still extended the invitation. Steve and McKenzie showed up every Sunday at one without fail. Davy would still be in his church clothes, wearing an apron because when he cooked, he really got into it.

Dinner was served at the table with all the proper placement of forks and knives and spoons. Dessert came afterward and was usually something chocolate. Steve couldn't decide if that was because of Davy or McKenzie. They both seemed to have quite a fascination with the substance.

After dinner, Davy wouldn't allow anyone to help him with the dishes. One Sunday, Steve came out to the living room to find McKenzie watching football. After getting over his shock he sat down next to her.

"I thought you hated watching sports," he said.

"Shh!" McKenzie held up her hand. "Come on Tommy!" she yelled at the screen.

"Tommy?" Steve asked.

"Quiet," McKenzie insisted.

Steve looked at who was playing. Oregon State versus University of Oregon. Steve assumed that was significant. When McKenzie cheered at the end of a successful play by UO, Steve realized what was going on.

"So, this was your team?" Steve asked when the commercials came on.

"Is," McKenzie said. "This is like the most huge rivalry in... in Oregon."

"So, who's Tommy?"

"Oh, he was a freshman when I graduated. I tutored him in English that whole year. He was dyslexic so it took a lot of work for him to get this far."

"He's good."

"You would know."

"No, I mean, he's really good. You picked a good team."

"You know the only reason I care is because it was my school, right?"

"Hey, if it gets you to watch football, I'm happy."

"I knew a lot of the guys on the football team. Athletes often need academic assistance in my experience. That's why I watch them now."

"You know, it still surprises me that you stayed single as long as you did."

"Maybe I wasn't into football players."

"Well, where does that leave me?"

"You are _so_ many other things."

"Yeah, you're right. I never actually wanted to be a football player... for a living anyway."

"I can't believe you always wanted to be a Navy SEAL."

"No." Steve shook his head, laughing. "It's ironic. I wanted to be a cop."

"I guess I believe that. I didn't always want to be a teacher. I wanted to be a rock star when I was little."

"I find that somehow difficult to believe."

"It wasn't a realistic aspiration. But when my big brother told me I was the best singer in the world, I couldn't imagine being anything else."

Steve noticed the sad look in McKenzie's eyes as she mentioned Kyle. He leaned over and kissed her lightly.

"He was right," he said. "He was always right about you."

McKenzie nodded. "As misguided as he was, he knew me. I just wish there were some way to... honor the good things about him."

"What you just said. About how he thought you were the best singer? Remember those things."

"Yeah... I'm trying anyway."

Steve sighed. "I'd like to say it gets easier, but it doesn't really; it just... becomes part of you and you learn to deal with it."

"I know... I felt like that when you died. Like I would never really be okay again, but that in itself was somehow okay."

Steve shook his head. "You never should have had to go through that... I should have put you through it."

"I know why you did," McKenzie said softly. "And knowing that made me able to endure it. Knowing that you never wanted to leave me. There was never a moment I believed you didn't love me."

Steve put his arm around McKenzie's waist and kissed her forehead. "Then at least I did something right," he said.

**H-5-O**

Danny ended up hiring a new member after all. He was heavily influenced by Chin, whose partner the new recruit would be.

He was a young detective from HPD named Eric Kekoa. He had enough experience that no training was necessary, but he was young enough to still be teachable. If anything, Danny thought he might be just a little too open minded. But that was what they needed after what happened with Governor Jameson. Someone who wouldn't place stigma on Five-0 because of her.

Chin liked Eric. He was easy to get along with and he listened to those around him and was great at putting ideas together. He was observant, more than anyone Chin had worked with before, and he'd worked with some danged observant people.

Eric was certainly a good addition to Five-0, even if Jenna found him a little too easy going. She had been much more serious in the past few months. The others worried about her a little, but they knew she was intent on catching Wo Fat and nothing else mattered.

Eric lightened the mood at HQ considerably. He would talk a lot if encouraged, but he knew when to keep his mouth shut and pay attention. Danny really liked that about him. And most of all, he got along very well with Grace. The two of them had hit it off immediately.

Things at Five-0 were going all right. Everyone still noticed Steve's absence acutely, but that just made them all more determined to finish what he had started.

Having never met Steve, Eric couldn't quite identify, but when Chin explained that Steve was "ohana," Eric understood completely.

"Kinda wish I knew this guy," Eric said one day when he was talking with Chin. "I mean, I know that would leave me without this job, but he sounds pretty amazing."

Chin nodded. "I never knew a better man," he said. "And supposing he came back tomorrow, I don't think we'd fire you." Chin smirked. "You have your uses."

Eric grinned back, showing his big white teeth. "Thanks, brah," he said. "But I know I'm not quite up to Five-0 standards."

Chin gave him a cryptic look. "I wouldn't be so sure," he said.

**H-5-O**

Steve didn't really register when time began to pass. His life became routine and he didn't mind. He worked with Davy, he came home every night to his family, and he watched college football with McKenzie. She refused to watch the pros unless it was the Seahawks, which Steve was okay with. At least they weren't the Mariners. He drew the line there.

But it was one day, later in the year, when Lucy looked up at him and lifted her arms that Steve realized how quickly time was flying. His daughter was growing up before his eyes. She was still a baby, but soon she wouldn't be.

She stared at him with those big blue eyes and gave a little cry when he took too long picking her up. Steve hadn't realized it was possible to love her more every day, but he did. He knew it wouldn't always be this way. She would get older. She wouldn't think it was so cool to hang out with her dad all the time. But he would savor the moment that he was the only person in the world she wanted.

When McKenzie appeared in the door of the nursery, Steve was holding Lucy, whispering to her, knowing she didn't know what he was saying, but responded to his voice anyway.

"Hey," McKenzie said, coming across the room and smoothing Lucy's hair.

"Hey," Steve replied, smiling.

"I have a question," McKenzie said.

"What?"

"Do you ever think... there could be more?"

"More?" Steve asked.

McKenzie looked pointedly at Lucy and Steve realized what she meant.

"I think," he said slowly. "That there could be. I don't know when."

"I just wondered if you were open to the idea."

"Yes, then."

McKenzie wrapped her arms around Steve's waist and rested her head against his shoulder. "Maybe in a year or two," she said.

"Yeah," Steve agreed. "Maybe."


	5. Que Sera, Sera

**It's been a little longer than I expected, but I hope not too long. Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter. I hope this one is to your liking.  
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**Chapter Four "Que Sera, Sera"**

"_**Que Sera, Sera; whatever will be, will be."~Jay Livingston & Ray Evans**_

It was nearing Christmas when Steve took an afternoon off. He didn't tell anyone why and McKenzie didn't even know he was doing it. It was safer that way.

He sat down on a park bench and waited. Next to him were two cups of coffee. There were very few people around because of the cold weather, and the fact that most people were either working or Christmas shopping.

It wasn't long before Steve was joined by another man who picked up the second cup of coffee.

"Guy could freeze his ass off in this weather," he said.

"Glad to see you've grown to like Hawaii," Steve said

"I don't like it. I like my family. How do you like these normal winter conditions?"

"They suck. You know how hard it is to chase down a suspect when your feet feel like icicles?"

"I thought you were invincible."

"I am. I said hard; not impossible."

"Interesting. You'll be happy to know you've been replaced."

"Yeah? You've just totally invalidated my existence."

"Don't worry. The guy's nothing like you."

"Not surprising. Who is he?"

"He's a local detective. Eric Kekoa."

"He any good?"

"Yeah. He's great with putting things together."

"And how are the rest?"

"Well, my new partner is insane, but I think you knew that."

"Wait, who?"

"Jenna."

"Jenna? Seriously?"

"Seriously. I know; I'm an idiot."

"And she's doing okay?"

"Define okay. She's like you. I mean with the whole Wo Fat thing."

Steve nodded slowly. "How's the family?"

"Karl's cutting teeth. Grace loves him. Kono's getting used to being Mom and kick ass cop at the same time."

"And Chin?"

"Chin... is getting married. Kono is ecstatic. He likes working with Eric too."

Steve let out a long breath. "Life goes on, huh?"

"Yeah. You guys doing okay?"

"Oh, yeah. Davy at least lets me wear the kind of shoes I like."

"That's... wonderful, I'm sure. And McKenzie?"

"She's a lot better. I think the peace and quiet is good for her."

"And my favorite niece?"

"Lucy's good. She loves it when I carry her around. I think it makes her feel bigger than everyone else."

"That is understandable."

There was a pause and Steve could no longer resist asking the question he needed so badly to know thee answer to. "How close are you?" he said.

For a second, Danny didn't say anything. Then he ran a hand down his face. "Honestly, not much more than we were in March," he said.

Steve sighed. "I know you're doing what you can."

Danny shook his head. "It's not enough."

"Danny... Don't let this take over your life. It isn't worth it."

"Your life isn't worth it? The safety of your family? I know. I know. I just... don't think any of us feels at ease as long as he's out there, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. And I know you'll find him."

"Here." Danny handed Steve the bag he had been carrying. "It's not much, but we wanted you all to have something for Christmas."

Steve smiled and took something out of his pocket. "This is even less," he said handing Danny a flash drive. "It's just pictures and videos of the family."

Danny took it and smiled. "Thanks," he said. "Same time next year?"

Steve smirked. "Well, I hope to see you before then."

They stood up and faced each other.

"How is your other project coming?" Steve asked.

Danny looked confused and Steve pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket. When he started reading, Danny's eyes widened.

"'Chin and I are already planning an addition to the garage. (You need it!)'" Steve said and then looked at Danny for an explanation.

"I can't believe you still have that," Danny said. "It's been..."

"Don't remind me."

Danny shook his head. "That particular project is coming along slowly, but we're getting there. And just in case you were worried, we do take the cars out for a drive every once in a while."

Steve smiled. "Thanks," he said. "You didn't have to do all this."

"Yeah, I did," Danny said with a sigh. "Take care of yourself, all right?"

"You too," Steve replied.

They shared a quick hug and went their separate ways. It wasn't the sort of reunion either of them wanted, but it was enough. For now.

**H-5-O**

Steve didn't come home until late that evening and McKenzie was starting to worry. She tried not to because she knew Steve was more than capable of taking care of himself in all situations. But with Lucy napping and classic Christmas songs on the radio, McKenzie found the house eerily quiet.

She vacuumed around the tree, and began to understand why people had plastic trees. She still liked the real one. It smelled good.

This was her first Christmas having a tree since her parents moved to Hawaii, so she wanted to go all out with it. There was a wreath on the door and thick red ribbon twisted around the stair railing. She dressed Lucy in red and green. Though, honestly, she knew her daughter looked better in blue or purple. It was Christmas, after all.

When Steve did get home, McKenzie could tell something was going on, though she wasn't sure what. She noted the paper bag he carried and the somewhat wistful look in his eyes.

"Okay," she said, as she stood in front of the tree. "I'll bite. What's up?"

Steve smiled. "You know, with the lights behind you, you look sort of..." Steve trailed off as if he couldn't think of a good word for it.

McKenzie crossed her arms. "Thanks, I guess," she said, with a hint of a smile. "You still didn't answer my question."

"I don't know what's in the bag," Steve said. "That's kind of how presents work."

"Someone gave you a present?"

"I think it's supposed to be for all of us, but I didn't think it was right to peek ahead of time."

"So?"

"So, what?"

"Who is it from?"

"Oh, uh... The family, I guess."

"The family? As in, our family? Our family that lives in Hawaii?"

"That would be them."

McKenzie had an expression as if there were many questions she would like to ask, but couldn't decide which was most important.

"I saw Danny today," Steve clarified. "I didn't tell anyone because it's safer that way. He's gone home now."

McKenzie's expression became unreadable. "I wish I could have been there," she said.

Steve nodded. "I know. But this will be over soon."

McKenzie nodded back, and Steve didn't tell her what Danny had said about being no closer to finding Wo Fat than they had been before.

**H-5-O**

Jenna grumbled under her breath. Sometimes she felt like she was the only one who ever accomplished anything around here. She had to remind herself that it was nearing midnight and Danny still wasn't back from wherever Steve was. Still, she couldn't help venting her frustration on the easiest targets.

Of course, Kono wasn't working as much with a baby and Eric was still a little new. She wasn't exactly a seasoned cop either. But there was something about Eric that rubbed her wrong. Maybe it was his obvious happiness. Jenna had never considered herself the bitter cynic type, but she was beginning to have second thoughts.

"Hey," a voice brought her out of her thoughts and she looked up from the computer to see her new nemesis standing in the doorway.

"Kekoa?" she said. "What are you doing here?"

He moved closer to stand on the other side of the table. "It's Eric," he said. "And I was just about to leave when I saw the light on."

"What, you were still here?"

"Yeah." Eric shrugged. "I was in the training room. It's a great way to work off steam, you know. And it helps when someone wants to kill you."

Jenna seemed to be thinking. "I suppose you're right," she admitted rather hesitantly.

"Why do you sound like I just won a heated argument?"

Jenna shrugged and turned back to the computer.

"You don't like me," Eric said. Jenna started to disagree, but he cut her off. "I can respect that," he said. "But I'd like to know why."

Jenna had little to say to that. "You're happy," she confessed. "Guess that bothers me."

Eric nodded, as if he understood anything. "I get it," he said. "I know I haven't been through half the crap that all of you have. But I can see how it must hurt. And I don't even know the whole story, do I?"

Jenna shook her head. "There's a lot more," she said.

"Well... maybe you'd care to explain it to me?"

For some reason, that sounded like some kind of offer to Jenna. She wasn't mistaken.

"What do you say?" Eric asked. "I'll buy the drinks."


	6. Deer In the Headlights

**Finally updating! I know I'm a horrible person for taking so long. I hope you're all still out there. Thanks for reading if you are.  
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**Chapter Five "Deer In the Headlights"**

"_**Tell me again: was it love at first sight when I walked by and you caught my eye. Didn't you know love could shine this bright? Well smile because you're the deer in the headlights."~Owl City**_

Strangely, Lucy didn't like Christmas much. The tearing paper and strange new objects seemed to alarm her. And it wasn't as though one could explain to a ten-month-old that a present was supposed to be a good thing and that she should send a thank-you card to Uncle Danno for the toy he brought her.

It was obvious how much McKenzie loved the season, and Steve was trying his best to be as excited as she was. His last nice Christmas had been two years ago with his team, and before that, the one in 1991 before his mother died.

But when he opened his present from Danny, he thought he might just like Christmas after all. It was a light blue tie with waves and pineapples on it. After staring at it for a good thirty seconds, he laughed and shook his head.

It was Christmas Day, and the McGarrett living room was littered with wrapping paper and frayed ribbons, but the fact that he could even think of it that way made Steve happier than he would have thought possible.

He hadn't lost everything. Far from it. In some ways, leaving Hawaii, he had gained everything. His family was safe and happy. He was reasonably content in his job. Now seemed like the perfect time for something bad to happen.

But nothing did. Christmas passed silently, and life went on as it had before. They had been in Chicago almost a year. Lucy's first birthday was approaching.

That was when Steve looked in the mirror one morning and wondered what had become of who he used to be. He almost felt like he didn't know himself anymore. How did this reckless, thoughtless, socially inept machine turn into a responsible, living, breathing husband and father.

Steve had never been opposed to the idea. On the contrary, he had always wanted it. He just didn't think he would ever be _good_ at it.

But the fact that Lucy now ran to the door every time he came home told him he was more than good. He was everything she needed him to be.

So, the fact that he was far away from home mattered less and less to Steve as time went by. He would never stop wanting to go back, but he would never take that at the expense of the life he now had.

**H-5-O**

Jenna began to tolerate Eric more after their few evenings together. She learned that he worked very hard and did his best with whatever task he was given, rarely complaining. For that, she could put up with his over-bright attitude.

Danny told her she needed to lighten up. Kono did too. Even Chin mentioned how serious she was all the time. Chin, the serious one.

Jenna knew they didn't really understand. Maybe McKenzie did since Wo Fat killed her brother, and Steve, of course, with the loss of his parents. But they were far away, and Jenna had no contact with them.

Still, the other members of Five-0 were determined to catch Wo Fat because of their friends. Jenna knew that in her head. She often felt like they didn't care though.

There was one case in late January that really shook her up. They had tracked some of Wo Fat's associates to a small compound on Kauai, but when they got there, they were too late. The whole place was in flames, bodies everywhere. He'd killed them before they could make the bust.

Upon arriving back at HQ that night, Jenna boiled over. She shouted at whomever would listen. To her surprise, that happened to be Eric. He stood in his office doorway, arms crossed, with a look of patience on his face.

Everyone else had gone home. Jenna's throat was tight from yelling. Still, Eric stood there, as if waiting until she was finished.

"What do you want?" Jenna finally said.

Eric looked a little amused. "I just thought you'd like an easy target," he said. "I don't take it personally."

"How big of you," Jenna snarked.

"If you say so. Actually, I was waiting for you to finish so I could sat something."

"What's that?"

"You can't control everything. What happened today was no one's fault but the bastard who killed all those people. Granted, they were bad people, but if he can give them up without so much as a sneeze, I'd say we have bigger problems here."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"I don't know. I'm just being realistic. The thing is, you can't affect what he's gonna do. He's a criminal; he does bad things. You or any of us are not to blame. So, you want to go get drinks, or are you gonna go home and pout?"

Jenna crossed her arms. "You know something," she said.

"What?" Eric asked with a smirk.

"I hated you more when you were nice to me."

**H-5-O**

Steve started wearing the pineapple tie to work. The guys at the station teased him of course. Not for wearing a tie; they all wore ties, but for wearing a tie with pineapples on it when he had been so adamantly opposed to neck wear in general.

Davy just sat back and watched. He had perhaps some small idea of what that tie meant to Steve and he would have thought it strange if he didn't wear it.

Of course, Steve found other uses for it. Like restraining suspects or distracting shooters. Somehow he always managed to get it back in one piece, and Davy seemed to think that was significant.

"What, like it's a lucky tie or something?" Steve asked him one day.

Davy shook his head. "I don't believe in luck," he said. "I'd say it's more symbolic of your connection to your home and your partner."

"Did anyone ever tell you that you're a philosopher?" Steve asked, leaning back in his chair.

Davy nodded. "Several times. But I'm right, am I not?"

"Yeah. And with proper grammar too."

"How would you know?"

"My wife is an English teacher and my former partner likes to tell people when they're wrong."

"And you miss it. Hence the tie."

"Oh, hence," Steve agreed, nodding and looking serious.

**H-5-O**

Danny tapped his pen on the desk as he filled out reports. Not his desk. Steve's desk. Suddenly, Danny threw the pen across the office so hard it stuck in the wall opposite him.

Standing up and cursing nothing in particular, Danny ran his hands through his hair. He moved to the window and tried to focus on something that wasn't Wo Fat.

No such luck.

It'd been a year. A freaking year. Still, they had nothing. Nothing substantial, anyway. Oh, they'd snagged several minor players, taken out a lot of Wo Fat's strongholds, and generally managed to piss the man off. Perhaps that only angered him more.

Danny turned away from the window and looked at the half completed report on the desk. It could wait for morning. He grabbed his keys and left without saying goodbye to Jenna. She'd be there all night unless Eric took her out again.

Danny couldn't quite figure out if those two had a thing for each other or if he just knew how to manipulate her. Either way, he thought that Eric Kekoa was definitely good for Jenna Kaye.

Getting into his car, Danny wondered how many more times he would have to drive himself around this damn island. He'd never admit it, not under the most intense torture, but he missed Steve driving. Once in a while.

Still, the sight of his little white house with the fence around the yard always managed to cheer Danny up. Inside, the smell of dinner, whatever it was, came floating through the rooms.

Nine-month-old Karl was in his playpen tossing little orange balls around until he saw Danny.

"Da?" he said, as if it were a question.

"Yeah," Danny said with a smile. "I'm home."

He picked up his son with one arm and tossed his keys in the basket by the door. Then he moved into the kitchen where Kono and Grace were discussing the finer points of Hawaiian cuisine. Danny had learned to just shut up and eat. He'd married a Hawaiian, and his daughter was quickly assimilating.

"Danno!" Grace said, rushing over to give him a hug.

Even at eleven years old, she still called him that. Ironically, every time Grace said "Danno," Danny thought of Steve. In a good way.

"Dinner's almost ready," Kono said. "Did you finish up at work?"

"I still have a report to finish, but that's all," Danny said.

"I asked Jenna to join us this weekend."

"What did she say?"

"She just gave me a blank look, and I told her she was welcome."

"Maybe Eric will convince her to come."

"If anyone can. I tell you, that boy's got some kind of superhuman power over her."

"Boy? He's your age, Kono."

"I feel old."

Danny laughed. "I'm sure you do." He looked at Karl. "What did I tell you?"

Karl only tilted his head and gave Danny a curious look.

"That's what I thought."

"Dad, can I invite my friends to the thing on Saturday?" Grace asked.

"The thing?" Danny said.

"What do you call it? A party? A Barbeque? Whatever."

"Are you even gonna be there?"

"Yeah."

"Have you informed your mother of this?"

"She's not gonna say no."

"You'd better ask anyway. It's her weekend."

Grace made a face. "They're _my_ weekends."

Danny nodded. If only it were that simple.

Setting Karl in his highchair, Danny sank into his own chair. After a typical day and a typical Williams family conversation, he was ready to eat whatever Kono had cooked and try to remember that even if Steve were here, it certainly wouldn't make his life any easier or less complicated. Just more interesting, more whole.


	7. Exactly What You Want

**Wow, I'm on a roll! Thanks to all of you who are still reading. I really appreciate it. I will finish this story; I just hit a dry spell for a while there. I know how it ends, just not how to get from point A to point B to point C... et cetera. So, any thoughts for what you want to see in this story are welcome. For instance, I'm not sure where Jenna and Eric are going, so I'd love to know what you guys think.  
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**Chapter Six "Exactly What You Want"**

"**A am everything you're not, and it's exactly what you wanted. We both know, you can't plan something as real as this. It takes more than plans to feel like this."~Ivoryline**

Steve woke to something pulling at his eyelids. He blinked several times to see the smiling face of his now one-year-old. As his mind out together the pieces he sat up suddenly.

"How did you get out of bed?" he said.

Lucy only tilted her head and grinned. Before she could run off again, Steve pulled her up onto the bed.

"Am I going to have to modify your crib?" he asked.

Lucy giggled and rolled over between Steve and McKenzie who was still asleep. Fearing that all her wiggling would wake McKenzie, Steve laid back down and moved Lucy onto his stomach. She sat still for a moment, her big blue eyes seeming to search Steve's for something.

"Happy birthday, Lucy," he whispered. He knew she probably didn't know what that meant. It didn't matter.

She laughed and snuggled into Steve's chest. He could just about wrap one hand around her tiny body. He rested his other hand on her head, stroking the fine hair behind her ears.

"Ready for breakfast, baby?" Steve whispered.

Lucy perked up. She knew the word _breakfast_. She had her mother's affection for all things edible.

Steve got out of bed and carried Lucy downstairs. As he held her in one arm while fixing breakfast with the other, he thought about everything that had happened a year ago today.

He wondered what he would tell Lucy about the night she was born. Nothing about the circumstances had been normal. He had a few more years to worry about that anyway.

Years. It sometimes scared him to think of where he would be in another year or two or three. It had been one already since he came to Chicago, or would be in a week. Steve wondered if this was the way he would live for the foreseeable future. Always afraid of when someone might catch up to him and try, again, to take away everyone he loved.

So far, there had been no cause for alarm. Victor Hesse hadn't made contact in several months. His last update was to say that they were fine, and Wo Fat was nowhere near finding them, too busy with staving off Five-0.

Danny, Chin, Kono and the rest probably had no idea how much they were doing to keep Steve and his family safe. But the next time he saw them, he would be sure to let them know.

Of course, Steve always wondered when he would see his extended family again. His sister was living in his house, his partner was running his task force, and the rest were doing their best to make his home safe again.

He knew it wasn't just for him, but for McKenzie and Lucy too, but sometimes he felt like the whole world moved because he needed it to. Danny _had_ often compared him to a force of nature.

**H-5-O**

Jenna knew it was a bad idea. To get attached. To get involved. Eric was irresistible in a lot of ways. He was sweet and naïve sometimes, but he know when to be straight with her and call her on her obsession.

There was the problem. She wasn't just obsessed; she was consumed. There was no room in her life for anyone else. Only Josh and Wo Fat.

But here she was in the parking lot of their favorite bar, pressed so hard against his body that she couldn't breathe. His lips tasted like coconut and alcohol. His arms around her reminded her that she was not the only human being on Earth. He reminded her of life.

She was going to ask him to come home with her. She was going to make a huge mistake and regret it the next day.

But he didn't let her.

"Jenna," Eric said, catching his breath.

"Huh?" she replied.

"I like you. I always have. But I don't want to ruin this."

She looked into his warm brown eyes. Then she made a different mistake. "There is no this," she said, and she walked away.

She got into her car and drove home and cried herself to sleep. Cried for Josh, that she lost him. And for Eric, that she would never have him.

Work the next day was tense. For about a week Eric seemed to tiptoe around her. He didn't ask about that night. He didn't try to make her explain herself.

Finally the week came to an end. They'd caught three cases and closed them all in those five days. None had anything to do with Wo Fat.

As she sat at her desk, going over all her files one more time, Jenna heard a knock at the door. Eric stood there, just looking at her for a moment.

"You want to go for drinks?" he offered.

Jenna looked down at her desk. "I... uh, can't," she said.

"Just friends," Eric said. "I get it, okay?"

"Get what?" Jenna looked at him again.

"You're still not over him. I get it. So, we can just go back to the way things were."

"You mean me pretending to hate you?"

"Yeah. If you want."

Jenna shook her head, smiling in spite of herself. He was cute. That was the problem. She wouldn't keep resisting him, and she had a job to do. There just wasn't room for him in her life.

She knew she was missing out. She knew she should let him in. But in her heart, she felt it would be unjust to Josh not to hunt down his killer and bring him to justice. She didn't really have a choice.

Shaking her head again, Jenna stood up. "I think I'm just going to go home," she said. "I'm really tired."

Eric nodded. "Okay then. I'll see you Monday."

He left, and as the door closed behind him, Jenna sunk into her chair again. Resting her head in her hands, she bit her lip and willed herself not to go after him.

**H-5-O**

Jenna didn't show up to the Williams' barbeque on Saturday. Secretly, Eric blamed himself.

It wasn't so much of a secret since Danny and Chin assumed he had something to do with it from the way he had been so quiet all week.

"Should I go talk to him?" Chin wondered as he and Danny were standing beside the picnic table.

"He does look pretty miserable," Danny said. "What do you think happened?"

Chin shrugged. "Who knows. Hey, where's Grace today?"

Danny sighed dramatically. "Rachel is having parental insecurities."

"What's that supposed to mean, brah?"

"It's her weekend, and even though Grace wanted to come, she wouldn't allow it."

"Didn't you invite them too?"

"Yes. But Rachel doesn't accept those invitations anymore if you hadn't noticed."

"I had. I was waiting for you to say something about it."

"I'm not sure what it was, you know. I thought maybe she didn't like that I got married, but she seems fine with Kono. The only thing it could be is Karl."

"She's mad at you for having another kid?"

Danny shrugged. "I don't know. But this all started after he was born."

Chin shook his head. "Glad I'm not you."

"Just wait."

Danny was teasing of course. He thought Malia and Chin were perfect together. Their ceremony had been small with Danny and Kono as their wedding party. Chin confessed to Danny that he had really wanted Steve to be his best man. They had all hoped to have the Wo Fat situation sorted out by then.

Chin set his drink on the table and slapped Danny's shoulder. "Hang in there, brah," he said as he started walking toward Eric.

The younger man was standing off away from the group, holding a red Dixie cup, but not drinking out of it.

"Everything okay?" Chin asked as he approached.

Eric shrugged. "Yeah."

Chin smiled. "And you expect me to believe that?"

"What?"

"Come on. We all see how quiet you've been all week. What happened? Something with Jenna?"

"Why do you assume that?"

"Because the two of you hardly spoke all week, and you kept staring at her every time she wasn't looking. What happened?"

"I... don't know. I guess I sort of made a mess of things."

"How, exactly?"

"I pushed too hard, I suppose. I thought she was opening up, but... I don't know. And when I tried to make things right, she just sort of brushed it off and didn't show up today. I don't know what to do."

"You ever think maybe there's nothing you can do?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, Jenna has to decide to get passed this. She has to move on; you can't do it for her."

Eric nodded. "I know. I just..."

"Want to help," Chin finished. He smiled again. "And you should never stop trying to help, even when it seems hopeless. Maybe she'll come around. But either way, you're not responsible."

"Thanks, Chin. I... sometimes get too caught up in other people's problems."

Chin tried not to laugh. "I know exactly what you mean."

**H-5-O**

Steve felt her presence before her hands touched his shoulders. He knew he'd disturbed her with his tossing and turning.

It was one A.M. He had work in the morning. But there he sat on the couch facing out the front window at the early spring slush reflecting in the orange streetlights.

"You okay?" McKenzie asked, working her fingers into his muscles.

"Yeah. You should go back to bed," Steve replied.

"Something's bothering you."

"Same old stuff."

"Why do I not believe you?"

"Maybe because I'm lying." Steve turned his head to see McKenzie's face half obscured by the darkness of the house. She looked pensive.

"Why?" she finally said.

"I don't want you to worry."

"I know that. I do anyway, so you might as well tell me."

She moved around the couch and came to sit next to Steve. He leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. He wasn't sure how to explain this to McKenzie.

"You remember when I told you about those dreams I had while I was in hiding?"

McKenzie paused, she took Steve's hand and rubbed her thumb along the outside of it. "The ones about me and Lucy?" she asked.

Steve nodded. "I never wanted to tell you about that, but it was too much to keep in. This is... like that."

McKenzie leaned against Steve's shoulder, resting her head against his neck. "Who is it this time?" she asked.

Steve cleared his throat. "Everyone," he said.

"What?"

"Everyone I love. Even our parents are in it."

"How long?"

"McKenzie—"

"How long, Steve?"

He sighed. "Since Lucy's birthday," he said.

"That was almost a month ago."

Steve nodded. "It builds."

"How did you get it to stop before?"

"It didn't stop. I mean, not all at once. Danny was there, and he made me talk about it, and then it started to get better."

"And you didn't think you should talk about it with me?"

Steve leaned back against the couch, pulling McKenzie with him. "Like I said, I don't want you to worry."

McKenzie wrapped her arm around Steve's waist and buried her face in his chest. "We don't all have to be strong all the time," she said. "Let me protect you from something once in a while."

Steve wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead. "I love you," he whispered.

McKenzie tilted her head up, and her lips brushed his neck. "I love you too."


	8. Let Down

**It has been way too long since I updated this story last. I'm very sorry about the long wait. I hope there are still some readers out there who want to see the rest of this story. I think with the new information from the end of season 2 and beginning of 3, I've had some new ideas for how the story will go. It will still end the same as I originally planned, but there will be more going on, and it will help me get from here to there.  
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**Chapter Seven "Let Down"**

"_**I could never promise I won't let you down. You won't get my word you won't get hurt."~A Rotterdam November**_

It was long past time that Steve should have been asleep. He'd been doing better with that for the last few weeks, but that night, he couldn't seem to fall asleep. Lucy had been energetic that day so McKenzie was dead to the world. Steve was at least happy for that.

Getting up from bed after a few hours of trying to sleep, Steve moved soundlessly down the stairs. The house always felt cold at night. Probably because it was. It had been over a year, but Steve still wasn't entirely comfortable with the weather. So, he liked having carpet.

The streetlights shone through the front window as they always did. The slush had all melted, but the street still looked wet. Before Steve sat down on the couch, he heard a beeping coming from the kitchen. His phone. That was strange. Now that he worked a normal nine-to-five job, he never got calls in the middle of the night.

He had a missed call from an unknown number. The thought that it could be Victor Hesse calling to say they needed to relocate was the first thing that popped into Steve's mind. But before he could decide what to do next, the phone vibrated again.

Steve answered quickly. "Hello?"

"Steve?" It was probably the last person he would have expected. "It's Jenna."

"How did you get this number?" he demanded.

"I found it in Danny's desk. Your desk."

"Um... okay. Why are you calling me in the middle of the night?"

"Oh, is it late there?"

"It's late _there_."

"Oh. Um, you sound awake."

"That's because I am. Why are you?"

"It's... Josh."

"What?"

"My fiance. He's alive."

"How do you know?"

"I... well, I don't, but I got a message that he's being held by North Korean rebels. They want a two hundred and fifty thousand dollars to release him, and I... can't go alone."

Steve let the weight of what she was saying sink in. "You want me to take you," he said. "Do you even have that kind of money?"

"I sold my parents house a while back. I didn't think I'd be going back to Langley anytime soon."

"Okay, look, I don't know if I can help you, but I'll see what I can do.—Can I ask why you haven't told Danny about this?"

Jenna paused for a moment. "You're the only person I know who's crazy enough to try something like this and good enough to succeed."

The more Steve thought about it, the more he knew she was right. He was the best man for the job, and he wouldn't have been comfortable letting her go with anyone else.

"Okay," he said. "I'll meet you in Saigon. I have some contacts there who can help us get over the border. But you have to tell Danny what we're doing in case something goes wrong."

"He'll try to stop me."

"Call him from the airport. He can't do anything then."

"Okay. Steve, I—this is a lot to ask."

"That's what family's for."

**H-5-O**

After finishing his conversation with Jenna, Steve sat in silence on the couch for a good twenty minutes. He went over and over in his mind how he was going to tell McKenzie he was leaving for a few days. He knew she wouldn't be happy with it. That was perfectly reasonable.

But Steve knew he had to go. He wouldn't trust anyone else to do this, and he didn't want Jenna getting hurt because he wasn't there to protect her. Maybe part of him just really wanted to get back in the action he felt he was missing.

In the end, Steve decided the only thing he could do was leave immediately. McKenzie would probably be angry, but she would forgive him, and they would only have to argue about it once. He knew it was a sneaky thing to do, but he couldn't think of an alternative. He couldn't lie about where he was going, and there was no way she would be okay with him taking Jenna to North Korea under any circumstances.

It didn't take long to pack a few necessities and head out the door. McKenzie probably wouldn't realize he was gone until he didn't come home that night. But Steve couldn't let her wonder what had become of him for all that time, so he wrote a short note saying where he was going and why and that he would be back soon. He left it on the coffee table where she wouldn't immediately see it, but he knew she would find it before she started to worry.

The next step was leaving a message on Davy's phone to keep an eye on his girls while he was gone. Even though things had seemed perfectly safe up until now, Steve didn't want to take any chances.

As he drove down the freeway toward O'Hare, Steve was reminded of the last time he left his family. He hadn't been able to leave a note that time, but somehow it felt worse. Like he had more options and he was choosing the worst one.

He tired to shake the feeling off, but Steve couldn't help thinking that his return wouldn't be as happy as it was last time.

**H-5-O**

Joe White sat alone in the dark establishment. He had been surprised to get the call from Steve McGarrett to meet him in Saigon, but after hearing why, he figured he should have known. Steve was always trying to help people to the point that it got him into trouble. Joe hoped this wouldn't be one of those times.

He was also curious about the direction Steve's life had taken in the last few years. He had been invited to the wedding and heard about Steve's "death." But as of yet, Joe hadn't been able to get away from work to get the whole story. He didn't expect to hear much of it this time either.

When Steve arrived, Joe could see that his old friend had aged more than he would have expected. Perhaps it was all the more shocking considering the fact that Joe had known Steve since he was born.

The woman with Steve, who Joe assumed was Jenna Kaye, looked very out of her element in a place like this. From what Joe had heard, she wasn't the ideal companion on a potentially dangerous mission. That was why Steve had called Joe.

"You look terrible," Joe said as he shook Steve's hand.

Steve smiled, and Joe could see deep lines beginning to form around his eyes. "You haven't changed a bit."

"Somebody has to refuse to grow up around here. And you must be Miss Kaye." He shook Jenna's hand as well.

"Just Jenna. Nice to meet you. I've heard a lot of good things."

Joe looked at Steve again. "Probably lies."

"I told her you could help us getting in and out," Steve said. "Right now, that's all that matters."

"Well, it's not gonna be easy, but I think I can manage it. And in case of emergency, I have a friend with a chopper."

"Hopefully we won't need that, but it's good to be prepared."

"I take it you'll need weapons?"

Steve smirked. "That's another reason we're here."

**H-5-O**

McKenzie was cleaning the house when she found the note on the coffee table. She had been surprised that Steve was gone when she woke up, but she didn't think anything of it until now. As she read the words on the page, she was torn between anger and fear. Part of her wanted to wring his neck for being such a jerk, but another side worried she would never get the chance.

McKenzie tossed the paper back on the table. North Korea. She wasn't particularly interested in politics, but anyone knew it was a dangerous venture to enter that country and a challenge to get back out.

She tried to think positively. Steve knew what he was doing. He would be home safe and sound in a few days, and she could yell at him then. But what if she couldn't? She had lost him once before; McKenzie didn't think she could handle it again.

Davy showed up that evening. McKenzie had expected him. He didn't look particularly happy about the situation, but he didn't say anything as he helped feed Lucy her dinner while McKenzie cleaned up the kitchen.

"What did he tell you?" she finally asked.

"Only that he would be gone for a few days and to keep an eye on you two," Davy replied, his voice impassive.

"And you didn't think that was weird?"

"Of course it is. But spending nearly every day with him, I notice the restlessness."

"You think that's what this is about?"

"Not completely, but it might have made it easier for him to leave without telling anyone."

"He doesn't act restless at home."

"I'm sure he doesn't want you to think he's unhappy here. It would seem... resentful."

"You mean like he wishes he didn't have us to worry about?"

"I think that's exactly what he doesn't want you to think. And you know it isn't true, but Steve is used to a completely different life than this. He's made for it. You can't expect him to be content with suburban domesticity."

McKenzie shook her head. "I never did. I was surprised when he said we had to leave Hawaii, but I could tell he had spent a lot of time thinking about it. I know it was the last thing he wanted to do, but..."

"But his family is more important to him than his own comfort."

"So, why didn't he tell me? It's not as if I could have stopped him."

"I think you could have."

"How?"

"Think about it. You and Lucy are his whole life. Your opinion matters. If you had told him how much you didn't want him to leave, he probably would have stayed. He knew he would give in."

"Then why go at all?"

"It's quite simple really; he wants to help his friend. I would expect no less."


	9. It Ends Tonight

**Sorry it took longer than I thought to finish this chapter. But this week's episode inspired me, so I'm going to try to finish this one in a reasonable amount of time. I hope there are still some readers out there...  
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**Also, if you're interested, I'm writing a Star Wars/Avengers crossover story with Riter's Fury under the name "Shakespeare's Fury." You can find it on my favorites page.  
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**Chapter Eight "It Ends Tonight"**

"_**When darkness turns to light, it ends tonight... Just a little insight will make this right. It's too late to fight. It ends tonight."~All American Rejects**_

Jenna and Steve sat in the back of the Jeep as they drove into the North Korean jungle. In the front, Joe sat with their local driver. The noise of the engine and the tires on the dirt road prevented any conversation from front to back, and for most of the ride, Jenna was too nervous to make small talk. Steve was trying to focus on the task ahead, but there were so many other more banal concerns on his mind, and he couldn't seem to get rid of them as they drove further into the dense forest.

Steve had done a pretty good job of disguising it up until now, but he was becoming increasingly uncomfortable with this situation. It wasn't as if he had another choice, or so he kept telling himself, but he was out of practice for things like this. The most dangerous thing he had done lately was disarm a guy with a wrench who had the coordination of a drunken cow.

Steve refocused his attention on the mission. He still knew what he was doing, and hopefully, the exchange would be quick and painless. But when did anything in his life turn out that way?

Steve first noticed the hostage couldn't have been Jenna's fiance as soon as the brought him off the truck. Joe seemed to notice too. They tried to back away quickly, but that's when the shooting started. Steve shoved Jenna down on the ground and told her to hide under the Jeep. Their driver was killed first. Joe got into the driver's seat while he was methodically firing his gun at their opponents. Steve was on the other side, ducking behind the door of the Jeep.

"We gotta get out of here," he said.

"Get the girl up here, and we will," Joe replied.

"Can you cover us?"

"Oh, yeah."

Steve pulled Jenna up again and pushed her toward the car. He didn't have to tell her to hurry. She climbed into the back, trying to stay as low as possible. Steve was about to get in too when he heard someone behind him. He barely turned around before the stock of a rifle hit the side of his jaw. He fell to the ground, vision blurring. He saw dress shoes and the cuffs of black slacks. He heard voices he couldn't make out.

Steve tried to shake of the disorientation and felt a sharp pain blazing across the left side of his face. He heard and felt the Jeep moving away. He did not understand. Until he looked up.

He had only seen that face once before, but it was not one he would ever forget. It was the source of all this nightmares and the cause of his self-imposed banishment. It was the biggest threat to his family, and at this moment, probably the cause of Steve's death.

"I knew you would come," Wo Fat said.

"You set this whole thing up," Steve replied. Talking hurt.

"It was too easy. You may have turned one of my key operators against me, but I managed to use your friend against you without anyone the wiser."

"Yeah, yeah. You're brilliant. I'm guessing there's some reason you want me here besides to kill me."

"Why's that?"

"Because you haven't done it yet."

"Perceptive. But I think you know exactly what I want."

"Sorry. I have no idea. I know I kinda made a mess of things for you back in Hawaii, but haven't you more than gotten back at me for that?"

"This isn't about your pathetic islands. Or your family. Or even Victor Hesse, who will get what's coming to him eventually. This is about Shelburne."

"What's that?"

"I had a feeling you would be difficult." Wo Fat raised his head and shouted something in Korean. A couple of men from the truck came and lifted Steve to his feet.

From this angle, Steve could see that Joe and Jenna were long gone. He was grateful for that at least, though, he strongly suspected he would not be coming out of this one alive.

**H-5-O**

Danny was about ready to kill someone. Not that he didn't normally feel that way with his "partner," but this was beyond the pale. How could she be so stupid? How could she put Steve in danger like this? Yes, Danny was angry. But he was also worried. About Steve, about Jenna, about everything. He was worried about not getting there in time. Because he was going, that was not up for debate. It was just the getting there and getting Steve out that was the problem. He couldn't do it alone of course. He had already been in contact with Steve's former commander. Joe was the one who called Danny with the news after Steve had been taken by Wo Fat.

Danny thought about the implications as he sat on a plane with Chin and Eric. Steve was now at the mercy of the man who had nearly killed McKenzie. The man who did kill Kyle Carpenter and Laura Hills and Steve's parents. He had sent Victor Hesse to kill Steve once before. There was no question the man was dangerous, but what he wanted was something else entirely. If he just wanted Steve dead, he would have killed him right out, not taken him hostage. There must have been something else.

Kono hadn't wanted Danny to go. Or she wanted to come too. He wasn't quite sure which. It was a challenge to find a babysitter when you wanted to run off to North Korea for an impromptu rescue mission. Also, considering they could all go to prison for what they were about to do, someone had to stay behind in case things went bad. There were many sacrifices Danny was willing to make for Steve, but leaving his son to fend for himself was not one of them.

They hadn't actually talked about it, but Kono seemed to agree with Danny, even though she didn't like it. She never asked him not to go. She never said she would come too. Of course, part of him really wanted her there. The team was off as it was with Steve gone for so long, but now they would be two members less, because Danny figured Jenna wouldn't be very useful in this situation.

What was most surprising about all this was that Eric had immediately volunteered to come with them. It might have had something to do with him wanting to help Jenna, but Steve was the one in trouble here, and Eric had never met him. Maybe the guy was that dedicated to the team, or maybe he was just crazy. Danny didn't really care at this point.

The long plane ride passed in silence. Eric played games on his phone, and Chin pretended to sleep. Danny was restless, and he knew he was probably driving his companions crazy with the way he couldn't sit still. But that was a challenge under normal circumstances, and considering that his best friend was in mortal danger and/or dead, Danny felt that he was handling things very well.

They landed in Saigon and were met outside the airport by Jenna and Joe White. Jenna seemed to be about to speak when Danny put up his hand.

"I'm not talking to you right now," he said. Then he looked at Joe. "What's the situation?"

Joe narrowed his eyes at Danny. "Not too good," he said. "But we should talk about this somewhere more private."

Danny nodded. "Let's go."

Introductions could wait.

**H-5-O**

To call it an interrogation would be a lie. To call it torture would be accurate but oversimplified. It was frantic, desperate, and it was a foreign feeling for Steve not to know the information he was being tortured over. In some ways, it was easier when he did know because he had a reason to fight it. This was just agonizing chaos with no meaning or end in sight.

Steve was practiced in the art of interrogation. Both sides. He knew how to ignore the pain and fear of never making it out alive. But at that moment, the most pressing issue on his mind was the very fact that he needed to live. He had left without saying goodbye to McKenzie. He might never see his daughter again. Those thoughts scared him more than he would have ever thought possible. He recalled the nightmares that had terrified him before Lucy was born. This was worse. This was real.

Finally, there was a lull of blows and burning, the inevitable exchange of threats and empty shouting.

"I'm going to ask you again—"

"Don't bother," Steve interrupted between haggard breaths. "Answer's still the same."

"Why are you protecting him?" Wo Fat sounded genuinely curious. "Surely getting back to your family must be more important than any other loyalty."

"Shelburne is a person?" Steve saw the tiny flicker of surprise in Wo Fat's eyes. "What'd he do to you?"

Steve expected the fist to his face that sent him spinning as he dangled from the thick chains. But he couldn't help laughing a little as he spit blood onto the grimy, wet floor.

"I never heard of him until today. Maybe if you tell me what happened, I can help you."

"You think this is a game, don't you?" Wo Fat moved closer to Steve's face. "One where you win if you can outwit me? Where you walk away if you just hold out long enough?" He shook his head and smiled—not a happy smile, a decidedly unhappy smile. "You are not going to walk away from this if I don't get what I want."

Steve smirked in spite of the thought that walking away was a very unlikely outcome under any circumstances. "And what if I'm telling the truth, huh? What then? What if I can't give you what you want?"

"I would be very surprised, and you are trying to distract me again." Wo Fat shifted on his heels.

"No," Steve said. "I'm actually trying to figure out how I get out of this alive. I'm not seeing any viable options here."

"Tell me where Shelburne is, and you're free to go back to your family."

Steve tilted his head to the side. He couldn't help thinking how nice that sounded. But it didn't change anything. "I don't know. You can threaten me all you want; nothing's gonna change that."

Wo Fat twisted the instrument of torture in his hands. "You are very stubborn."

"I've heard that before, but no one has ever called me a liar. If I did know, I would just refuse to tell you. Probably. Since I don't know, this whole _interrogation_ is one massive waste of time."

"If one of your suspects told you that, would you believe him?" Wo Fat raised his eyebrows.

"If I chained him to the ceiling and jabbed him with a cattle prod—which I wouldn't do—and he still said he didn't know, I think I would believe him. It's not worth dying for, whatever it is."

Wo Fat appeared to be thinking for a moment. "Perhaps you need some time to think about it," he said. "And an alternate source of persuasion."


End file.
